Three things I am thankful for today.
The first goes without saying and will always be #1. The health and life of my family.
When I was due with my 2 year old, I belonged to a message board that had sections for people due round the same time. I got to know these women online quite well. Going through the ups and downs of our pregnancies together.
One of the women had her baby. A beautiful baby boy. Dark hair and rosebud lips. He was born no longer alive. He has passed during his birth… into death.
We were all heartbroken for her and her husband. Of course, we could not be as heartbroken as they were.
I have thought of her often in the past two+ years.
During the last bit of pregnancy, I thought of her little one, and her, almost daily. I realized how very fragile life is. Not that I did not have an appreciation of it before… but it really hit home.
When my turn came, and my son was born easily into the world via a super simple c-section, I was so relieved. So glad that he was alive and that I could watch him breathe and blink and cry.
I felt the same when my last one was born as well.
And daily I am still so thankful that I have five beautiful children. I am appreciative.
Today I went to the little one’s site. His parents had made a site for him while she was pregnant, just as I did while I was pregnant. We used the same site, I got the idea from her, when she first shared the link to her site. Pregnancy pictures, ultrasound pictures, pictures of the nursery… and then a picture of her holding his darling little blue body in her arms. She looks grief stricken, shocked, but still glowing through it all… she brought her little man into the world the best she could. It was not her fault that during the process, his umbilical cord did not provide him with the oxygen he needed to continue life.Her husband looks like he had been crying also, but he is smiling and looking like a proud dad.
They got to know him for nine months. And it seemed completely right that they should have their first picture with their darling one.
Yes. I am grateful for the lives of my ones I have brought to life.
#2 I am grateful for the roof over my head.
I truly am. I am so grateful that my mother bought a home as an investment that my husband and I pay mortgage on. We have a stable home for at least 5 years. I have rented all my life, since I moved out at 16. Finally at 35 the renting game is over. With five children it is REALLY nice to have that stability. Home ownership these days is difficult. Canada is NOT the easiest place to buy a home, especially on the west coast .
#3 Well, I am grateful that my path has led me where I am spiritually. I am glad that through the Craft, I have been able to find my way to the Divine. I had given up on religion. Decided to take on ‘spirituality’ instead. I tossed out ideas of the bible and Jesus and was happy as a Neo-Pagan. Although it provided much room to grow, I was lacking that connection still. No deity called my name. I felt no drawing to a patron God or Goddess…. then through discovering Gnosticism I was awakened to the Christ and Sophia within, and from that point onward, I have begun a wonderful journey. One that will lead me home. I have been homesick all my life, and did not know why. I did not know where I was longing for. Now I do.